26 September 2009

societal lines

i spent a long time not being okay with who i was.
when i learned to love myself, i grew so confident that i didn't realize how quickly i'd been burning.

i've convinced myself that i'm not okay with who i am anymore. if i beat into my head that i'm not good enough, then i'll start working hard to prove that i am. although, it's a little tough to go from confident to not so confident.

so fuck you, world. you win. time to get those wings back and i am going to soar like i did before.

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end of year goals:

-at least B in Arabic and Poli Sci, B+ in Stats,
-wake up before 12
-expand my group of friends
-lose this belly? :0
-DON'T NAP AS MUCH
-find a reason to like it here.
-work out consistently
-no smoking! tobacco or otherwise.
-learn to drive around in socal?
-do some kind of culture night. or big performance event.
-recultivate sense of leadership that i lost.

2 comments:

rigel said...

I just hope that when you look back on your college years, you won't slap yourself and regret every single thing you did.

I wish the old happy Trung was back. I hate reading about you being so miserable.

(But I have to admit, being miserable seems to be the best muse for writing. I hate hearing that you're miserable, but I love all these posts that have been sprouting up.)

trung n. said...

i agree. it's just i'm realizing i'm really unhappy in the place i am right now. i feel stupid in my arabic classes, i feel unhealthy when i can't run, and a whole host of other things i was going to blog about (but it got deleted mysteriously)

...plus my sociology class makes me think about myself lol.